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"Those are some really cool sneakers you're wearing."

"Hi... what's your name? Where did you get those sneakers, anyway?"

For a long time, I thought these were run-of-the-mill opening lines, chosen primarily for their innocuousness. It's only in the past year or so that I've really clued in to the whole "woman and shoes" thing. Women really do judge men by the shoes they wear.

I have this magical pair of Etnies. I just happened to borrow them from my roommate one day, and I've been wearing them for a while now... I would be hard pressed to say what's special about these sneakers. All I know is that when I'm wearing them, they act as total girl magnets.

I also have a pair of well-worn, comfortable combat boots that I've had for eight or ten years. They also get me tons of action. Only drawback to those is the time it takes to remove them.

A friend of mine was telling me about a date she once went on. "He showed up at the restaurant, and when I saw what he had on his feet, I could barely stay through the whole meal," she said. "I took one look at his shoes, and I could tell he just wasn't living in the real world."

This has become one of my favourite criteria when I'm sizing up a lady. Sometimes I find myself looking at what she's wearing and saying, "Is she living in the real world?"